July 9th What's Up Tiger Lily?
July 12- The Palace
July 15th The Hangout
July 16- What's Up tiger Lily?
July 19th- LARGO Los Angeles w/ Nick Kroll
July 20th- Comedy and Magic Club, Hermosa Beach, CA
July 21st- Comedy and Magic Club, Hermosa Beach, CA
July 22nd The Hangout
July 23rd- What's Up tiger Lily?
July 27th- Comedy and Magic Club, Hermosa Beach, CA
July 28th- Comedy and Magic Club, Hermosa Beach, CA
August 27th What's Up tiger Lily?
August 27th The Public House
August 28th Performance Anxiety
August 29th The Meltdown show
Had to fill out a background check for a new job. It was yes or no questions with no lines for explanations. They wanted information from me going back ten years. Do you have any outstanding warrants? Have you ever been convicted? Have you ever been fired from a job? Sure I’ve been fired but I’d like a line to explain. I’ve filled out background checks before, I know how they work. Since they didn’t give me an explanation line, I answered all with question marks. Every one. Even the one that asks if Ive ever served time in prison. They’re the ones doing the background check, why am I giving them answers? Do your job Big Brother.
The fortune cookie from my breakfast this morning reads, “You will bring sunshine into someone’s life this week.” It’s a great fortune and a nice promise, but when you take into account that I am eating Kung Pao chicken for breakfast, I am probably not in the position to bring sunshine anywhere. Maybe a more fitting fortune might read, “you will leave a voicemail message on someone’s phone this week” or “write this week off, you’ve already started off on the wrong foot” C’mon China, get to know your customers. Then profits will soar.
Court-ordered community service is NOT the same as volunteer work.